Admitting Negative Emotions

Laughter can conceal a heavy heart, but when the laughter ends, the grief remains. Proverbs 14:13

Some Christians don’t want to accept the fact that they have negative emotions. Anger, fear, disappointment, loneliness, frustration, depression, and sorrow don’t fit the stereotype of successful Christian living. We often try to push negative emotions to the back burner and ignore them. That doesn’t work very well, as King Solomon noted. We can ignore our negative feelings, but that doesn’t make them go away. In fact, ignoring them can actually intensify them.

I believe that it is far more productive to identify and accept our emotions and then seek God’s direction regarding what we are feeling. Feelings are like thermometers. They report whether we are hot or cold, whether all is well or not so well. If all is well, we can celebrate by praising God. (There are many biblical examples of this; see Psalm 103 for one.for one) If emotions indicate that all is not well, we can turn to God for help. (Again, see the Psalms for vivid examples of King David and others bringing strong feelings to God. Psalm 13 is one example.is one example) God will give us wisdom if we need to take action. He can give us comfort if the situation cannot be changed. Always, we should share our emotions with God and seek his guidance.

“Lord, this is how I feel. Now, what do you want me to do about it?” This approach will lead to more insight about yourself, more empathy for your spouse, and more wisdom in your decisions. All this contributes to a growing marriage.

PRAYER
Lord, I am grateful for the Psalms, which show so clearly that you welcome us to express our emotions to you—whether positive or negative. Please help me to do that freely, rather than bottling up my sadness or anger. As you give me comfort and guidance, I know I will act more wisely, and that will benefit my relationship with my spouse.