Praying for Change

The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. James 5:16

True or false? When you are in a bad marriage, there are only two options: resign yourself to a life of misery, or get out.

Many couples live in deep pain. They have tried to improve things and have failed. Thus, they accept the commonly held dichotomy: I need to get out and start over, or else I must accept the fact that I’m going to live in misery the rest of my life. I want to suggest that there is a third option: Let God use you as a positive change agent in your marriage. It is true that you cannot make your spouse change. However, you can positively influence your spouse to change. Most of us underestimate the power of influence.

We also underestimate the power of prayer. The Scriptures include many examples of people pleading with God—and his answering them. James 5:16 tells us that our earnest prayer can bring remarkable results. And the apostle Paul reminded believers to devote themselves to prayer (see Colossians 4:2) and to pray constantly (see 1 Thessalonians 5:17). So pray for your relationship. Ask God to give you a clear picture of how you got to where you are in your marriage. What needs to change for you to have a growing relationship? Ask God to show you how you might be an instrument in his hand to influence your spouse. It’s a prayer he will answer. And he will give you the power to do it.

PRAYER
Father, I come to you needing your help so much. Please show me how we got to this point as a couple and what needs to change. Use me as a change agent. May I have a positive effect on my spouse.