Shoulder Pads
Read Proverbs 25:1-28
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11. Timely advice is lovely, like golden apples in a silver basket.
12. To one who listens, valid criticism is like a gold earring or other gold jewelry. . . .
17. Don’t visit your neighbors too often, or you will wear out your welcome.
18. Telling lies about others is as harmful as hitting them with an ax, wounding them with a sword, or shooting them with a sharp arrow.
19. Putting confidence in an unreliable person in times of trouble is like chewing with a broken tooth or walking on a lame foot.
20. Singing cheerful songs to a person with a heavy heart is like taking someone’s coat in cold weather or pouring vinegar in a wound.
21. If your enemies are hungry, give them food to eat. If they are thirsty, give them water to drink.
22. You will heap burning coals of shame on their heads, and the Lord will reward you. Proverbs 25:11-12, 17-22
One day a friend reveals a major problem. You’re uncomfortable with this disclosure and your friend’s ensuing tears. “Buck up!” you say. “Tough times never last, but tough people do! It’s just so much water under the bridge! Cheer up! You’ll feel better soon!”
Proverbs 25 contains a critique of the classic stoic approach to counseling, and the review is not good.
In this chapter you will also find these lessons: not exalting yourself; appropriate rebukes; how to ensure your plans will fail; and the value of self-control.
Proverbs 25:20 urges us to avoid being light and cheery around those who are grieving and sad. In fact, to say “Cheer up!” and discount the feelings of a hurting or distraught friend can have the opposite effect.
Whenever you encounter people who are sad or hurting, don’t deny or minimize their pain, or belittle them for feeling the way they do. Instead, respect their feelings. Parents, do this for your children. Married person, do this for your spouse. Do this for your friends. Do this for anyone who confides in you. Listen with compassion and offer support. Give them a shoulder to lean on.
